Realizations of a (Serotonin) Junkie
As I was going 95 mph down Wurzbach Parkway, I kept thinking to myself, “holy shit! I could die at any second. awesome.” That was one of the many moments I have come to the realization that I subconciously like to be suspended between life and death. This, as you can probably tell, has gotten me into quite a bit of trouble in the past. In high school I was always viewed as being the really werid and mysterious hippie girl. Dare me to do anything, I would do it, hands down. Why do I do this? Why do I constantly put myself in situations that could potentially kill me, or worse, paralyze me? I think it all boils down to one thing: boredom. I spend all day sitting down doing what I am told; I sit at school, in the car, at work, at home. These fibers of my rebellious/adventurous nature peeking through my seemingly normal exterior are not “just a phase”. No amount of medicine and/or therapy will be able to cure my insatiable need for adrenaline. I long for that cathartic feeling you get after you just reached 100 mph in a Honda Civic, or after you wake up from a self-induced blackout. I think I am crazy sometimes, I really do. I am just a kid and have been through more than most adults that I know.
